I’m Beautiful Like Me.

So yesterday I joined a forum for local moms. I was pleased to find a place where I might find other moms like me in my area. And, I suppose I did. But I was so repulsed by a few peoples’ comments that I cannot bring myself to participate there anymore. At least not right now. The first comment was “breastfeeding is disgusting.” Another disagreed, but said she thinks it’s “weird” when a baby walks over to his mother and starts tugging at her shirt for a breast.

Not offensive to me at all. /sarcasm

I am fortunate that the people I associate with in real life do not have these sort of small-minded opinions or at least are smart enough to keep the opinions to themselves.

I try not to pass judgments on the way a mom feeds her baby. The fact is that I do wish every mother at least try to nurse her baby and further, I wish every mother would be successful in that endeavor.

Motherhood is such a demanding and often thankless job that it saddens me that we often make a competition of it amongst ourselves. Moms - both those who formula-feed and breastfeed - are often made to feel shame over the way they feed their babies. Formula-feeding moms are “second best” and “don’t love their babies as much” as their nursing mom counterparts. Nursing moms are “Jezebels who flaunt their breasts to the world” because - in this culture, at least - breasts are sexual. And that’s not even mentioning the mom who - *GASP!* - extended nurses her babies into toddlerhood! She must get some sort of sexual gratification out of it (insert eye-rolling smiley here, please).

Breastfeeding is natural (hard as it may be, at times). Scientific studies prove that breastfeeding is best. “Scientific studies” that state otherwise are almost assuredly funded by formula companies or the companies that own them. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) and the World Health Organization (WHO) both state that babies should nurse for at least the first year. WHO’s stance is the first two years.

Humans are mammals, so named for our mammaries. All mammals nurse their young. Cow’s milk is perfect for baby cows, human milk is perfect for human babies.

All that said, I’m quite grateful that we have a nutritious and safe alternative to breastfeeding these days so that all children have the opportunity to survive when nursing is not an option - regardless of why it isn’t an option.

Some moms truly do not make enough milk to sustain their babe (although it is rare). Most often, misinformation causes a new mom to not feed her baby enough. Schedules may work for the bottle-fed baby, but they do not work for the nursing baby. The supply/demand cycle gets screwed up and she eventually does reach the point of not making enough milk. It can often be resolved very early by nursing more and not supplementing with a bottle and following baby’s hunger cues.

Some moms work full-time outside of the home and pumping alone cannot sustain their babe. I have operated several high-dollar (even hospital-grade pumps) personally and know without a doubt that if I had to work outside of the home, I would not have been successful at nursing for long (mad props for pumping, working moms!!!). I don’t know of any scientific research out there on the subject, but my experience with other moms that do pump exclusively often suffer from supply problems.

Some moms struggle with getting it right in those emotional beginning weeks and have no support whatsoever. This was the case for me when Joy was a baby. We struggled for 3+ painful and stressful months before giving up. I got very little support from the community (and how could they support me when I didn’t know who to ask for help?) or moral support from Joy’s dad. I was alone in my suffering. And the guilt was enormous.

Plus, there are a range of health issues that can keep a baby from being able to nurse. I’d name some, but frankly I only personally know of two health reasons why a mom cannot nurse and what they are called eludes me (in my defense, they are rare and have weird names).

So, I try to not pass judgment of the way a mom feeds her baby. I wish more people would do the same.

Things are well.

Joy is grounded for school misbehavior last week. She was allowed to attend a birthday party at the bowling alley but it cost her an extra day’s restriction. She’s doing quite well academically in school, but struggles to get along with classmates. And she’s chatty. She complains loudly of boredom all weekend long and after school. I’ve been hoping that she would take this opportunity to read more. She has, but only a little bit. She’s usually a pretty good kid and I hate punishing her, but I have to be consistent or she will continue with the unsavory behaviors.

The boy is amazing. He’s got three teeth on bottom with two coming in and one tooth on top and the second is coming in. He walks more each day. He’s figured out how to stand without using anything to pull up. He says “mom,” “mama” and “dada” and babbles a lot all day. He squeals - quite loudly, too. He mimics me when I belch or growl. He claps along with his movie during the song “Bingo.” He eats all day, everyday. Today he ate cheese, olive and mushroom pizza that I cut into tiny bite-sized pieces. Then he harrassed me and squawked while I ate ice cream. He gets so filthy from food that we are now bathing him everyday instead of the 3-4 times per week.
Husband is home from work tonight. He’s been working a lot of overtime and it seems I rarely see him during the long weeks. I had kinda hoped he would take the night off last night since we met on Superbowl Sunday two years ago (not until after that game, though) and I’m a bit sentimental about that time, but he didn’t want to hang out with football-crazed tata.

Man, was I ever pleased with the outcome of that game! To be perfectly honest, I’m not necessarily a fan of teams, but more a fan (or un-fan) of players. I’ve followed the Giants a bit because of Tiki Barber and Jeremy Shockey (who were both on my fantasy team last year - didn’t play this year). I do love the Bucs, but it’s been hard to follow them since I moved back to KY. All the games aired on regular TV when I lived in FL. Here, the team most frequently aired on TV is the Colts, whom I initially liked because of Tony Dungy (former Bucs coach), but also now like because I adore Peyton Manning. It’s not hard to decide to root for his brother, as well. And since I’m on an honesty kick here, I absolutely despise Tom Brady for no good reason. No one should have life as good as him. So, the outcome of that game was merry for two reasons: Peyton’s brother won (Tiki’s retired and Jeremy didn’t play) and Tom Brady lost. Plus, he got knocked around quite a lot, too!

My Hashimoto’s seems to be under control. I should be going back for more bloodwork soon, but I would rather wait until we’ve paid the outstanding bills for bloodwork already done. The first round of bloodwork diagnosed that the TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) was abnormal. The second round of bloodwork determined I have Hashimoto’s thyroiditis (an autoimmune deficiency wherein my immune system attacks my thyroid) and the third round of bloodwork determined that my 50MCG dose of Synthroid seems to be effective, since my TSH came way down from the first round of bloodwork. Doc wants additional bloodwork drawn up to see if the TSH has come down more after another month of Synthroid. I’m going to make it two months so we can catch up on the bills. Plus, the Synthroid is really interfering with my ability to fall asleep and Doc is reluctant to give me any prescription sleep aids since I’m still nursing. I’ve been hunting for an inexpensive used copy of Medications and Mother’s Milk to take in when I go see her next so I can try to convince her that it’s safe for her to give me a sleep aid! For now, I’m taking Tylenol PM but it takes so long to kick in.

Otherwise, life is beautiful. Marriage is wonderful. I have such an awesome relationship with Husband. My kids are happy and healthy and there is much to celebrate and feel blessed for.